I'm 50 going on 60 ( I'm 16 going on 17 )

A parody of  "I'm 16 going on 17" from the Sound of Music
To all the 50-year-olds.

Original:  I'm 16 going on 17  from The Sound of Music

A parody: I'm 50 going on 60 from The Sound of Money

(Rolf) You wait little girl On an empty stage For fate to turn the light on Your life little girl Is an empty page That men will want to write on (Liesl) To write on (Rolf) You are 16 going on 17 Baby it's time to think Better beware Be canny and careful Baby you're on the brink You are 16 going on 17 Fellows will fall in line Eager young lads And roués and cads Will offer you food and wine Totally unprepared are you To face a world of men Timid and shy and scared are you Of things beyond your ken You need someone Older and wiser Telling you what to do I am 17 going on 18 I'll take care of you (Liesl) I am 16 going on 17 I know that I'm naive Fellows I meet may tell me I'm sweet And willingly I believe I am 16 going on 17 innocent as a rose Bachelor dandies Drinkers of brandies What do I know of those? Totally unprepared am I To face a world of men Timid and shy and scared am I Of things beyond my ken I need someone Older and wiser Telling me what to do You are 17 going on 18 I'll depend on you

(a young Liesl) You wait old man On an empty stage For fate to turn the light off Your life old man Is an old carriage That women will want to ride on (an aging Rolf) To ride on (a young Liesl) You are 50 going on 60 Baby it's time to think Better beware Be canny and careful Baby you're on the brink You are 50 going on 60 Women will fall in line Scheming young maids And lovely mermaids Will offer you mood and wine Totally unprepared are you To face a world of slime Stupid and shy and scared are you Of things beyond your time You need someone Younger and nicer Telling you what to do I am 17 going on 18 I'll take care of you (an aging Rolf) I am 50 going on 60 I know that I'm naive Women I meet may tell me I'm sweet And willingly I believe I am 50 going on 60 ancient as pharoahs Bachelor parties Drug-laced candies What do I remember of those? Totally unprepared am I To face a world of slime Stupid and shy and scared am I Of things beyond my time I need someone Younger and nicer Telling me what to do You are 17 going on 18 I'll depend on you